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| Geese Flying (Wikimedia Commons) |
The Message of the Geese
Overhead I saw geese flying north today;
Thus I knew that spring had arrived once more.
It's time for earth to begin to restore,
so symbolic when the geese come to stay.
There must have been hundreds in the array,
their collective squawk was loud as a roar;
it was such joy for me too watch them soar;
I am happy to be on their throughway.
It is the simple things that bring such joy;
I must remember to always look up,
not only for geese but to watch clouds.
Life's happiness is something not to destroy,
so many abundant joys one can sup.
The clouds and geese can lift our heavy shrouds.
I wrote this for dVerse Poets: Form for All where Sam Peralta introduced the Miltonian sonnet. It is a sonnet in iambic pentameter. The rhyme scheme in my sonnet is abba, abba, cde, cde. My last line is a slight 'glitch,' but c'est la vie. I did the best I could. (And I really DID see these geese flying over today. I did not take a photo. I wish I had......... My picture would have been more impressive than the one I shared from Wikimedia Commons. Sigh.)
I LOVE geese and the honking of their message. They fly over us here all the time and it always thrills me. Loved this poem, Mary.
ReplyDeleteah i bet that was a wonderful view...and a wonderful sign as well that spring is almost here....your words are very easy in the form, nice flow and imagery...it almost did not feel formy you know...smiles...it is the simplest things...i agree in that...you did well have a wonderful evening mary
ReplyDeletesmooth. Everybody makes it look so easy...writing a sonnet.
ReplyDeleteI wish our geese would migrate but an elderly couple next door interrupted their instinctive move by providing abundant feed year round. It isn't fair to the geese or the people who have to adjust to constant presence. I envy your annual signal.
ReplyDeleteOh this must be a wonderful sight to see the geese. I'd loved to see it for real but it's nice to see them through your words. Yes it is the simple things that bring such joy. Just loved this Mary!
ReplyDeleteHow wonderful to see the geese - a peaceful and evocative sonnet
ReplyDeleteThis was a tough prompt to respond which is good in a way, it makes our brains think inside the box at times haha. I enjoyed your story of the geese. As others have said, you've captured the feeling of joy. I love watching them fly along as long as they don't land near me. They tend to bite don't they? Oops, rambling here. Nice job :)
ReplyDeleteOh returning geese would be a glorious sight. Yes we should savout the small signs.
ReplyDeleteAha...how beautiful it must be to see those geese flying up in the sky! Wish, you'd taken your personal pic, Mary!
ReplyDeleteLovely poem. It's wonderful how one can measure the arrival of spring according to the behavior of these birds!! Lovely...lovely piece of writing!
oh i would love to see the geese fly as well.. have never..seems like we're not in their travel route over here..really cool verse mary and so true as well, it's the small things that bring joy into the everyday
ReplyDeleteThis message of geese is beautiful !!!
ReplyDeleteYour sonnet reads as freely as the geese fly. Excellent achievement.
ReplyDeleteMary, seeing those geese return has been a joy for me. It's like they are telling us that spring is here ~
ReplyDeleteI think there is a type in the second stanza: "too" watch them soar ~
Also, its good to see your words flowing smoothly ~ I rather read a smoothly written poem than to read a perfectly constructed sonnet, but words are jumbled up so awkwardly ~
Mary,
ReplyDeleteNice poem about the flight of the geese. I agree always keep your eyes on the clouds.
I must remember to always look up,
not only for geese but to watch clouds.
Sure flies away with the words you display and yep a sure sign of spring, as they come back to each wing.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful thoughts and form--there's nothing like the sound of a skein of geese coming down to land on a pond, low overhead. Thanks for sharing this happiness!
ReplyDeleteYou put a happy smile on my face after reading this poem. As a Canadian my arms are open for Canadian Geese, you're all welcomed. Thank you for this wonderful sonnet.
ReplyDeleteLooking up is very important..I like to think of us being on the same goose flight path..i think they come here for winter!
ReplyDeleteI wish you'd had a camera with you, as well! The picture you paint of the geese returning - even with just your words - has such universal meaning and appeal that it is irresistible.
ReplyDeleteThe simple things that bring such joy - such truth, really well written sonnet, (i can't write like this) much admired, excellent.
ReplyDeleteNice job with the form, Mary; I love watching them, too, but too many at once for too long a time in my back yard can be a bit annoying..I admire their..I do admire their wildness, their take offs and landings ;)O
ReplyDeleteGeese as a sign of spring, must be lovely.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the form! I love the sounds of geese. Canada geese usually spend the winter here--and some seem to stay for the summer as well. I am sure it would be nice to their honking call of spring's arrival.
ReplyDeleteHard to catch all the photos one sees, but you caught it in your mind. k.
ReplyDeleteGeese soaring works for me, just saw that very formation sitting on a jet. Beautiful visions, wording, message.
ReplyDeletenice... i saw a flock of over a hundred yesterday... you captured it well
ReplyDeleteI like this...the geese don't fly this way, too dry... never more. I miss seeing them.
ReplyDeleteAh, I wish indeed you'd have snapped a picture of your geese - sounds like it would be impressive.
ReplyDeleteCool poem! Especially since it was inspired by a real event in your life.
Do geese fly over every house? {ah, a good poem opening!}
It seems my memory is full of geese in many places I've lived.
And they always fly over my house!
We see what we want to see, eh?
And why not? It enriches our day.
For your symbolic geese restore life (Spring) and joy.
Maybe that is why we look up into the sky for inspiration.
I really enjoyed this poem, so here are my humble thoughts if you should ever consider a re-write:
(1) You capitalized your sentences, so why not also "Spring".
(2) Don't know if you were shooting for consistent iambic but some lines were clunky
(3) Don't know if you were shooting for consistent pentameter, but if we count for 5-stress , instead of 10-syllables, there are several twitches.
(4) And as you admitted, the last line seemed a bit forced ('glitch'). Hard to get rhymes for words we have already chosen and are attached to -- the challenge of form. Let me try:
"The clouds, and geese can lift our heavy shrouds."
Consistent Iambic pentameter is really tough for me. And if we are in a hurry (and I know you are incredibly busy), to do it consistently AND put in interesting content is very tough. Some try to say iambic pentameter mimics normal speech, but I think not.
Either way, your after note, the fine poem and the message within were excellent -- really enjoyed. Thanx.
Yes, & at times we really do manifest what we envision.
ReplyDeleteSabio, thanks for your detailed comment. Yes, geese fly over every house at this time of the year. I see them in the sky a few times each day, and I am sure groups are flying when I am NOT seeing them. They squawk as they fly, so if one is outdoors one will always tend to look up to see them flying overhead.
ReplyDeleteYes, I know the iambic pentameter is not correct; but without working days on the poem (I worked more then two hours & decreed it finished) I was satisfied with 10 syllables & the correct rhyme scheme.
The word "spring" is not capitalized. Seasons are not.
March would be.
Good suggestion for the last line. I will use it. Thank you!
Well I'll be damned -- must be my Germanic background (we capitalize every little thing). I see that you are right -- well, unless lovely Spring is personified. ;-)
ReplyDeleteAs for geese, my question was rhetoric in a philosophic-poetic manner.
Yes, I too put in lots of time on my sonnet -- pain in the ass -- but enjoyed. I get it when enough is enough. I had some of that today too! ;-)
Ah, but one out of 4 ain't bad -- glad you liked the line suggestion.
The joy of the coming of spring!
ReplyDeleteGeese have never flown over my house, ever! One day perhaps...
Anna :o]
Here in the Antipodes we don't have this seasonal sight, though other birds fly in similar flocks/formations just to get to bed for the night. But I fell in love with Paul Gallico's 'The Snow Goose' at an early age, and with Frankie Laine's 'Wild Goose's Brother' when not much older, so the very thought of what you describe always thrills me, and evokes a strange longing. :) Such a symbol of freedom, I think, in both those contexts. And for you, in this poem, a symbol of joy and renewal. For both of us an uplifting of the spirit!
ReplyDelete